Monday, April 27, 2009

Is Anybody Listening?

People who know me, or should I say know me enough to have been around me when I'm "slightly intoxicated," know that I tend to say "Listen" alot. And "seriously" ALOT. Those same people also know that I tend to be a little loud under those same conditions. It stems from my constant need to want to be heard. Like I feel like no one really ever listens or understands what I am trying to say. That may or may not be true, but who knows.
But the thing that is crazy, at least to me, is that I am so scared to write and truly say what is on my mind for fear that someone may actually read it. Like I want someone to listen but I am scared to be heard. What is that about? I think I have a fairly interesting story to tell. But I can't stop self-censoring long enough to tell it.
Maybe with practice the words will flow. I need to embody the swirls that I love so much. Just allow my thoughts to twist and turn which ever way they choose. You can't force a swirl. It won't come out right. You have to just let it BE. SimplyBE. I'm trying...still trying....
ME

2 comments:

  1. Interesting. I have struggled with that, or something similar on many occasions. I always ask myself, if I had the whole world listening what would i say? Thats were I usuallay find the words.

    ReplyDelete
  2. from visiting just a little bit, you have lots of wonderful and interesting things to say...as well as posts that make me say "you, too?!" and it seems to me you have a fantastic sense of humor. write away, dear woman, write away!

    ReplyDelete